Raphael (Ray) Tupa

The following obituary of Raphael (Ray) Tupa was written by Emma Anders-Tupa (Ray’s mother) and by Gabriel Tupa (Ray’s identical twin brother).  Raphael (Ray) Tupa of Houston passed away at the age of 55 on Saturday, June 6, 2015, at Memorial Hermann Hospital at the Texas Medical Center in  Houston after nearly a 20-year long and courageous battle with a brain tumor. The funeral mass, burial, and reception were all  held at Moravia, Texas on June 9, 2015. Msgr. John Peters of Hallettsville Sacred Heart Catholic Church officiated the mass, Schwenke-Baumgarten Funeral  Home of Schulenburg arranged the funeral, and Peters BBQ of Ellinger catered the meal. Ray is the son of the late Henry I. Tupa (formerly of Moravia) and Emma Anders-  Tupa (formerly of Schulenburg). Ray is survived by his wife Dayrin Cordón-Tupa and their daughter Celeste. He is also survived by his mother Emma and his identical twin brother  Gabriel and two younger brothers Mark (and wife Cheryl) and Roger (and wife Melissa). Furthermore, he is  survived by three nieces: Kimberly, Megan, and Lindsey and by seven nephews: Jeffry (and wife Chunjia and son Maxumilian and daughter Abigail), Westly, Daniel, Jeshua,  Nathan, Ryan, and Matthew – all of whom were Ray’s pallbearers. Ray had an extraordinary passion for learning and was constantly engaged in some intellectual pursuit. He possessed  many natural scholastic abilities such as researching, writing, and tutoring. He thrived in the academic environment and demonstrated academic excellence in all his academic endeavors.  He received numerous awards and honors over the course of his formal education. His hard work and dedication to his studies culminated in his graduating summa cum laude (with highest  distinction) from every educational institution he attended: high school, college, and university. His fascination with  math and science and his almost insatiable thirst for knowledge drove him to earn a bachelor’s degree and a master’s degree in electrical engineering from the University of Houston. Ray delighted in technical challenges and enjoyed troubleshooting problems and fixing broken things, whether a faulty electrical circuit, a check-engine  light, or a plumbing leak. Ray worked for an oil and gas company as a electronics laboratory technician for several years, but, unfortunately, he was unable to  pursue his engineering career goals due to his declining health. Ray appreciated music, language, and nature. He learned to play the cornet in middle school and taught himself to play  drums, piano, guitar, and bass. He participated in a band, studied to arrange music, and gave drum lessons. He strove to speak different languages, namely Spanish, German, and Polish. He occasionally took long walks  on nature trails, relishing the solace and communion with God he felt on them. One of the most rewarding roles Ray performed was that of being an educator. He derived great pleasure from sharing his knowledge and his experiences with others. He was very generous in this way. He earnestly desired to use his education to help make living life (in his own words) “a little more bearable and a little more comfortable.” Ray led a spiritual life and was devoted to the Catholic  Faith. He was a third-degree member of the Knights of Columbus council at Our Lady of Czestochowa Catholic Church in Houston. He often prayed the rosary and attended daily mass. He would also compose, memorize, and recite many prayers. He admired the long-standing  history, the truthfulness, and the reasonableness of the Catholic Faith. He appreciated the practical guidance the Catholic Church offers on Christian living, and he embraced the firm beliefs the church holds on the sanctity of life and marriage.  Despite all the trials and tribulations that this life brought him, Ray would repeatedly thank God for all his blessings, especially the measure of health, the divine revelations, and the wife and child He had given him. He would often ask God and those he offended to forgive him of his failures and shortcomings, and he would also seek God for further spiritual maturity and perfection of his faith. He understood that the true meaning and joy of life comes in serving God and others and that pleasing God means obeying His commands, honoring his marriage vows,  and making his will secondary to His. Here I, Gabriel Tupa, present a few personal reflections about  my identical twin brother and about what his life and his death have meant to me. Ray was not only my identical twin brother but also my older brother, albeit by only 14 minutes, and on a few intense  occasions he’d remind me of that fact. We didn’t always see eye-to-eye on everything. Nevertheless, I had the good fortune of spending the last two and a half years of his life with him. In regards to his struggle to heal and to live, Ray fought his fight, ran his race, and kept his faith valiantly to the very end, never giving up, always praying, hoping, and believing that his best days were ahead and then letting God determine whether those days would be here or in heaven. I thank God for taking my brother to the better place to live out his best days, that is, a place where he will no longer suffer pain, fear, or rejection; a place where he will forever feel unconditional love, joy, and  peace. Thank You Lord for restoring to my brother his life, his dignity, and his integrity. Living with Ray taught me how precious life is no matter how much or how little there is in a person. Not a day went by that my mom or I didn’t cherish  his presence. There’s a big difference between silence and absence. Given his circumstances, he complained next to nothing. I’ll never forget how he’d give us a thumbs up or a handshake letting us know how he felt during the last few months, weeks, and days of his life. Many times my mom and I would be having a conversation at the dinner table with Ray sitting there quietly and then, out of the blue, he’d correct our pronunciation or our diction. Ray was engaged, listening and tapping into his memory. Oh Ray, how the difficulty of caring for you pales in comparison with the severity and longevity of the mental and physical affliction you endured. Forgive me of adding to your burden the weight of my complaints and my negligence. Pray for me so that I would be as much of a blessing to others as you were to me and that I would be able to carry my end-of-life cross even half as well as you did. You left me and others who really knew you a great spiritual  legacy and I’m proud of having you as a brother of mine. I love you. Rest in peace.